I Spent Three Years Searching for the Cause of My Pelvic Pain. The Answer Was in My Brain All Along.

Diagnosed with interstitial cystitis and told it was incurable, I tried everything. Here's what finally worked.

By Carolyn Evans, LISW-CP, psychotherapist and chronic pain specialist

Living with any kind of chronic pain is isolating. Chronic pelvic pain can feel even lonelier. Even in our post–Vagina Monologues era, many women remain reluctant to discuss anything pelvic or vaginal. I understand that hesitation. I suffered with debilitating pelvic pain for more than three years before finding my way out. And while I felt alone, I was far from it: an estimated one in seven women in the United States is affected by chronic pelvic pain, and for the majority of them, no clear cause is ever found. But here's what stopped me in my tracks: according to leading mind-body medicine expert Dr. Howard Schubiner, in more than 90 percent of pelvic pain cases, there is no structural damage. No injury, no disease, nothing structurally wrong to explain it. The pain is real. But its source isn't where everyone keeps looking. It took me more than a minute to let that sink in, too.

I'm a licensed clinical social worker and someone who solves problems with the focus of a trained assassin. But when chronic pelvic pain hit me, the pain consumed everything: my sleep, my relationships, my sense of self. Finding the cause, and the way out, was no simple task. I share my bumpy wellness journey as a cautionary tale, but more importantly, as a detour for you toward healing. Because if you struggle with pelvic pain, you deserve the most direct route to getting your life back.

Two doctors, two opposite answers

My first consultation was with a female urologist who delivered her diagnosis with clinical precision: interstitial cystitis. Incurable, she added. Sitting on crinkly white paper with my legs dangling off her exam table, I felt tears form. She offered a prescription with a pesky side effect of extreme hair loss, which I declined. I did what most people in chronic pain do: I sought a second opinion. This male doctor breezed in flanked by his male residents, listened briefly, and declared with 100% certainty that interstitial cystitis didn't actually exist. "Then why am I in so much pain?" I asked. "Why do I wake twelve times a night to pee?" He didn't know, and I don't blame him. This approach wasn't on most doctors' radar yet.

So I went looking outside medicine

Two strikes with traditional medicine sent me toward alternatives. I worked with a 30th-generation Chinese Medicine doctor who believed my pain was hormonal and could be cured with acupuncture and herbs. His elegant bedside manner gave me hope. I dutifully swallowed muddy herbal prescriptions each morning and quit alcohol, coffee, and sugar on his recommendation. Months passed. The pain persisted. Next came a medical intuitive healer who scanned my body and announced that a systemic infection was circumnavigating my entire system. "That sounds bad," I said. "It is," he replied, "but I can remove it, energetically." I reached for my Venmo app.

One month of relief, and what actually caused it

For one blissful month, I felt relief. I now know what actually happened: his reassuring presence sent messages of safety to my brain, temporarily calming my central nervous system and easing my pain. But I'm getting ahead of myself.

When the pain roared back, I doubled down on finding the answer. A naturopathic doctor specializing in women's health told me my problem was biofilms, colonies of bacteria that had banded together and taken up residence in my bladder. She prescribed antibiotics in relentless succession. These medications decimated the delicate balance of my microbiome and ravaged my gut lining. Why did I comply, knowing the potential harm? Because I was sleep-deprived, depressed, and desperate. She assured me it was the only way. And at that point, I believed her.

The offhand comment that changed everything

Exhausted but still determined, I pressed on. Near the end of a call with yet another nutritionist, she casually mentioned that I might want to look into the work of Alan Gordon, LCSW, and his mind-body approach called Pain Reprocessing Therapy (PRT).

What I learned changed everything: chronic pain, whether neck pain, pelvic pain, or fibromyalgia, often resists treatment because while it feels like it originates in the body, it may be kept going by pain circuits in the brain that have learned to fire. Pain Reprocessing Therapy uses psychological techniques to help the nervous system feel safe enough to stand down, breaking the chronic pain cycle.

I'm sorry, what?

To think that I had searched for three solid years and never encountered this information baffles me still. But everything is a process. And at that time, PRT was brand new to the healing world.

What Pain Reprocessing Therapy actually did

I was fortunate to train in Alan Gordon's founding cohort and become certified in Pain Reprocessing Therapy in 2021. I'd already done training in Internal Family Systems and was doing my own trauma-excavating parts work, which is probably why PRT landed so quickly for me. Turns out, those two models work together like a secret handshake. Within eight weeks, my pelvic pain vanished, and it hasn't returned. Since then, I've spent my days using the same combination of models to help my clients heal from all kinds (and I do mean all kinds) of chronic pain. The brain is remarkably creative in symptom production. The irony is, all these symptoms the brain generates? They're just meant to get your attention and keep you safe. It's sort of sweet, when you think about it that way. And we'd all love the sentiment if it didn't hurt so much.

If you struggle with chronic pain, I hope what you've read here opens a new door, for you or for someone you love. We all deserve a direct route out of pain and a life worth living.

Carolyn Evans, LISW-CP, is a licensed clinical social worker and psychotherapist in Charleston, South Carolina, specializing in chronic and neuroplastic pain. She trained in the founding cohort of Pain Reprocessing Therapy with its creator, Alan Gordon, LCSW, and went on to study with Howard Schubiner, MD. She created the Solve Chronic Pain™ online course to put her full method in the hands of people everywhere. She is the author of Forty Beads (Running Press, 2011), and her work has been featured on The Today Show, The Doctors, and in Time.